if you really want this, you best come correct

you know what? i was just about to fill up a sticky note of blog ideas, but then i changed the 'ol mind and decided to just start it. oh hey, i illegally downloaded like 4 albums of daphne loves derby and i don't even feel bad because they're not on itunes to buy!! alright, i feel a little bad. you caught me. 


i have lots of thoughts bouncin around in the 'ol noggin right now. first, do you think that all people are guilty of wanting things they can't have? i don't know. i mean i like to think i'm not like that, as i'm sure we all do, but then sometimes i feel myself being so disinterested in things that have come easily to me. and wistfully looking back on other things i've wanted so badly in my life that were just out of reach. that i just always wanted, or at least i thought i did. but maybe if i had actually gotten what i wanted when i wanted it then it'd be just be part of the menagerie of things i have but don't care about because of how easily they came to me. i'm being vague. i don't mean to. it's just that this applies to so many things. i mean most commonly people associate the concept with relationships, and i never, never want to be guilty of liking someone only because of like the chase or something like that. ew. but its possible i've been guilty of it in the past. probably we all have. but i've loved what i had perfectly well in the past so i think i'm okay. i don't think i'm defective (i often like to verify with myself that i'm still normal enough to carry out a functional life), just that i have many, various oddities within my personality. as we all do. but i'm super endearing for mine. so its ok. 


so school is out for summer (term)!!! aagghhhh SO NICE!!! ok sorry i know i just screamed at yall a bit with my all caps. but not going to school and just working is pretty much the best thing ever. as of today i've been out of school for a week and i am just as happy as a clam. or happy as a clown, as bryniffer would say. it's not even july yet and i've already finished an entire term of school/classes. i'm great. 


speaking of bryniffer!! the weeks are growing shorter before her and i are off to london for a whole semester! i can't even believe it. it's incredible. i mean i just know how much fun we're going to have and how happy we'll be and i just can't believe it. and in the winter i'll be able to come back to all my friends and gosh my life is just on the up and up. it really is. 

greatest thing ever:

i went boating this week!! wooooooooot!!!!!! only my greatest desire for like years. when i found out we were going you have no idea how excited i was. i want a boat. i wish all my friends were boat friends. not that i want new friends, i just want all of us to have boats. except i can think of a few snobs from ol irving, tx that probably wouldn't even want a boat. just for the sake of protest/principle. man i miss that place. and those people!

greatest news ever:

the mavs won the 2011 NBA championship!!!! WOOOO!!! oh my gosh i have not screamed that loud for anything in i don't even remember how long. like truly, i was joyous. what i triumphant win for us. such redemption after that heart breaking display in 2006, also against the friggen heat. at least shaq is gone now. i hate that guy so much it makes me want to throw up. also i'm not sure why i chose green to talk about the mavs since really they're dark blue but you know what, we can't always have what we want and i already just used dark blue and i can't have repeat colors goin down on my blog or else no one will respect me! yup. you heard me. 

(one of the) greatest holidays ever:

fourth of july!!! yup, you can't see that of, because it's in white. as it should be! but seriously, fourth of july has really always been one of my favorite holidays. i love fourth of july. growing up we would always get fried chicken at like popeyes or kfc or something and get tons of biscuits (omg delicious) and there's this big hill in dallas i think will these cow statues (i swear i'm not high, this is totally real), and just watch fireworks. actually no, that might be los colinas. great place for fireworks. I LOVE FIREWORKS. seriously like fireworks bring me more joy than many, many things. i really love them so much. i find them weirdly beautiful and they make me so happy. the past 2 4th of julys have been sucky actually so i really hope this one is good. last year wasn't sucky, i shouldn't say that. but alex was out of town so our whole family wasn't together and we sat on these boxes to watch the fireworks because we forgot blankets (bahahah we ghetto)and there were ants crawlin all over us! not pleasant. sheesh it's really just such a great holiday. my parents are going to a rangers game and i want to cry because i am so jealous. but i won't. i will keep it together. 

something great about summer:

well, really i should say something great about summer and not taking classes- having time to read :] i'm reading persuasion by jane austen right now and reading is just delightful. 

oh hey, looks like i did have a lot to say. 

remember when i went to st. george and back in the same day? yeah, that happened. welcome to summer. 

let's talk about bears

something really great that has been implemented in my vocabulary within the past year is attaching the word "bears" to things i'm feeling. i must admit that while i love to do this, it is a stolen habit from one roommate named laura steffen. 


what? you're confused? well let me show you how bears can be implemented in your life.
i am:
hungry bears
chilly bears
sleepy bears
sad bears


these are my most favorite and commonly used ones but of course you could say: angry bears, confused bears, and a myriad of other things i don't say but, again, could. 


OH!! and let me tell you another phrase i'm trying to bring back: on blast

as in: giirrlll, don't put me on blast!

for all of yall not street enough to know-being put on blast is basically like when someone calls you out. 

hey guess what? i'm failing miserably at doing my homework. yup. its 11:50 pm and i have a good hour or so of homework left to do that is being wasted away by talking about bears. 

wanna know something gay?

once this boy told me that he didn't date girls that didn't paint their nails. i seriously think that has played into my habit of always having my nails painted. i mean what is that? he was probably a closet gay. and good on him!

my own fav quotes of mine as of late:

-his eyeballs make him look like a baby

-lesbianism has made her fat

-i hate when people update their blogs faster than i can stalk them

-the only way i would pay $150 to go see a concert is if jesus christ himself were playing

i understand that by posting these quotes i run the risk of making myself sound like a terrible human. i am ok with that. 

i've never been more proud of myself

attention world: i have officially memorized all the words to the speed rap 'look at me now' by chris brown. 

if you're not proud of me, then you're stupid

k so maybe i memorized the karmin version without the swears but that makes no difference! the words/speed be the same. except for the swears, of course

hey, why won't you stop sucking?

oh, i don't know blog world. because it's just not in my nature. that's why! oh, and hey, get off my back! YOU DON'T KNOW MY LYFE!

oh lol i just realized it is almost literally 2 months since i've updated. i should probably be fired from even having a blog, huh? i wonder if there is like a cap as to how little you have to write for them to cancel your blog. hmm. and now it's been so long since i've written that people who used to read my blog have probably stopped checking back to see if i've updated. and i deserve that! lol oh wow i suck. 

next, it's not my fault in large part because the last 3 weeks-month of school were just killer. KILLER! yeah, i've been out of regular school for like a month. and i've been in summer school (technically spring term) for like a month and in a few weeks i'll be done with spring term and then i'll go on to summer school and i'll go to school until i die. this is my life now! but i am comfortable being a student. 

some people will hate me for writing this, but i am now a junior in college. i mean credit wise i've been one since january, but omg, i'm a junior. IN COLLEGE. i feel like i was a junior in high school pretty much yesterday. when i was 17. which incidentally, is what my last post was about. oh, what a good age. i can't believe i'm so old and that so much of my life has gone by so quickly. truly astounding. i remember never thinking i would make it to high school. like seriously if i ever take more than 4 seconds to think about my life i just think that it's astounding and surreal. my life is astounding. the next time i blink i'll be 35 and married with 4 kids, i feel like. wait, no, i just blinked and i'm still here. still a junior in college and not far from 21 years old and gettin waaaaaasstttteeeeddd!!! lolz. i'm jk. .....

so lots have changed since regular school stopped mid april and everyone left for home and provo got sort of deserted but actually in a REALLY nice way. hey guys! in the summer even if a dollar movie is brand new you just gotta get there like 20 minutes before hand! not like 3 hours!! amazing, right??

AND!!!!!! i did it. i got my hair cut. 

this was lo and i mere minutes after we did it. and we donated it!! on gah we are such great humans. sheesh this has been such a great experience. and so liberating! so many people told me not to do this and didn't want me to do this and it took five years for me to do it but hey. turns out i'm way hotter and older looking and my hair has like zero frizz now and yeah. i'm great. that being said its quite a bit longer now (i just got a haircut today, actually) because i'm growing it out to the 'ol shoulders to see how it will look. and then one day i'm sure i'll grow it out like 2-3 inches past my shoulder but that is a ways off. i have short hair now and i love it. and i love that i had the guts to do it. 

this is after it had grown out a bit. oh and hey, remember when i stayed in the library till 2 am writing a 15 page paper that took me 7 more hours afterward to finish? because i do.

you know, and i feel it enhances my edginess and sassiness. oh and now i also really love riding in cars with the windows down. eee!!

you know why i am bad at blogging? because i get so easily stressed an overwhelmed and i have tons of things to say and things that i think and then i just get overwhelmed with the volume of thoughts that i have and i say oh i'll do it later because i don't have time to update my blog now b/c it will take too much time because i have too much to say! and then the things i have to say build up and then yeah it's blog vomit. i've been terrible at blog stalking, as well, these past 2 months. so don't worry i've been neglecting all blogs, not just mine.

you know who i love?

nicki minaj. i have her song super bass totally stuck in my head. (oh wow it seems to be on my playlist should you be curious as to its contents) so, so sick. also her performance in 'The Creep' is SICK.  watch this. NOW.  

somebody please tell 'em who tha eff i is!!

what's new?

oh, thanks for asking! well i have a new apartment. that i love! i gots a bafroom in my room! sick? i think so. and i have new roommates. but i am really, really, really missing my old ones. namely chloe buffum, lauren kennington, and heather white. seriously. if any of you read this i miss you guys SO MUCH. like a sick amount. i'm gonna stop talking about this because it's making me really, really sad. you cannot be replaced. i love you all dearly and i just feel like there's a big part of my life missing. and it's you guys. 

but that being said good ol bryniffer is down the hal and i love that gal and ol ls is in the room right next to me and that is more than delightful. expexially when she makes freaking delicious cookies like she did mere days ago. she is loved. by me. 

but my room roommate is the one and only kirsten! we are presh as in we often do gay things like matching outfits (and sometimes on accident!) but we also tear up this city with our sass, sarcasm, and brutal honesty. 

like seriously, we're unstoppable. not to mention, the comedy comin out of this team is ridiculous. 

why i'm great:

-I'm pretty much the star of my acting class. everybody always wants to be my partner (actually seriously 2 partners ago my partner said to me, "laura, you're a star.") because i guess i've been doing it for a long time now (that's sort of weird to think about) and i guess most everyone hasn't been doing acting all that long or this is their first acting class and i've been doing it since i was 12. and really, i am a comedic genius. and we've been doing a lot of scenes where we make up what's going on and obviously all mine are hilarious. and everyone loves them and it makes me feel like the best human ever. you know how everyone is good at something? and sometimes it's hard to find out what yours is. but when you find it, and you do it, and other people validate you, you just feel like you're the best thing ever. at least i've found out what i'm good at and i'm planning on doing it for the rest of my life. it's nice to have something you're really good at. especially when a lot of other people think you're really good at it. so that's me braggin on me and just feeling great. i'm just proud. it's really nice to have some validation. 
-i'm memorizing all the words to Chris Brown's 'look at me now,' namely this version. and guess what? i'm way good at it. 

-i'm now able to paint my finger nails in 30 minutes. or less. uh yeah, this is real life. 

i'm in a good place in my life right now. i'm happy and i love my family and the people around me and i feel like i'm pretty successful. my life is on track, i'm studying abroad in the fall, it's fixen to be permanently warm, and lately i just feel like i have it together. thank you summer!

what chris trager from parks and rec might say: this was litrally....the best blog post ever

oh no! youths!

i wish i was seventeen again. instead of half way to twenty one. 


seriously. where does the time go? i will never go to high school with the people i went to high school with ever again. and that is sort of sad.

enjoy it. your life is empty without this link to this video

girl, you old

today is my half-birthday! and by today i mean the 22nd because by the time i post this it will be the 23rd. but yes, i am now half way to 21! and i thought this would be far more exciting than it has been. i guess 21 is kinda old. when i sometimes stop and think about the fact that i'm supposed to be an adult, or at least some form of one, it freaks me out. especially when i think about the fact that i am soon to start my JUNIOR year of COLLEGE!! BARF!!! where the freak does the time go??? i swear i was just a junior in high school. like just. and technically in january i'll be classified as a senior in college which is really, truly, ridiculous. i'm too young to be a junior in college. excuse me while i throw up. 

phew!! i'm back. alright, now shiz is about to get a little girlie. so i guess i'll write all this in a nice pink color so you can know where to pick up if you feel you are already bored. pink. begin. so recently my roommates and i aged about 40-50 years and had a classic motown jam sesh. we were just layin back, snappin our fingers, and talking about how life used to be. two of my absolute faves that i have sort of rediscovered, or become re-obsessed with, rather, are Stand By Me (cllaaaassiiiccc!!) and another called Sincerely. both are at the bottom of my little playlist guy so go do yourself a favor and take a listen! it's just such classy, romantic, music. just makes you feel like you wanna love someone. and by romantic i mean like idealism and sentimentality.

on another romantic note, i discovered what i feel to be an incredibly romantic flower that is now one of my favorites. i love fresh flowers. i always have. in my house, one day, i want to always have fresh flowers. but this new, delightful, little find is called the peony. 

i swear i'm not wedding crazy, these are just the only pictures i could find that i really loved

the tulip

the daisy

yup, they're beautiful. other favorite flowers of mine that the peonies will be joining are:

the daffodil

k, girl chat over. that was fun. 

-new song obsession that isn't many decades old: disgusting- by good 'ol kesha. girl knows how to make a catchy song. 

transition

good news, all!! temporary tattoos are back!!!

holy crap. man, i wish that little guy was real. i used to have one right there before christmas that was a little pink heart and i miss that guy, too. and of course when i say i wish it was real, i mean i wish i could have it until like age 25 and then it would just rub off. or really just as long as i feel like it. 

and now, for the quote portion of our program:
-"Today I'm going to do something better than I've ever done." -Cormac McCarthy
-"I'd rather get cancer than be a vegetarian." 
-"Those glasses make you look like a lizard."

-"See, the problem with him is that he's too moral."

yup, this blog is pretty neat. 

jam handz

a new blog post only one day after the first??? unheard of!! and yet here it is. 

my first correction to make is that like a noob, i wrote in my last post that i am an english teaching major. this is false. i should edit these things, occasionally. i am a theatre arts education major and an english teaching minor. i am retarted.

thats why i love my english classes because its like a breath of fresh air. a break from theatre. and yet they're still deeply connected to each other, in a way. i love getting the opportunity to read and use my brain in a more analytic way instead of having it in creative mode like 24/7. 

but now onto the main event of this post! my jam handz. and i suppose i don't mean this literally because i have no jam in my possession. at all. mostly because i can't afford luxuries like jam. and i don't buy bread. BUT, you can tell how much i love food when you see the keys of my laptop plastered with bits of food. or grease. and my little food stained paw prints on my laptop screen. 

disgusting??? oh, probably so. but i've never pretended to be otherwise. 

a girl has got to stay loyal to her priorities! and if you couldn't guess, my first one is food. 

you have no idea how many icons featuring food i collected as a 16 year old. like at least fifteen.